Doing What We Can: Mary of Bethany’s Example to Christian Women

I am a woman. I know from the creation account in Genesis that my femininity is a gift from God, and all gifts He gives are to be used for His glory. But what does it really mean to serve God as a woman?

That is far too broad a broad topic to address in one blog post, but this week I have been challenged by four specific aspects of serving God as a woman.

But first, I feel it necessary to state what the Bible teaches about gender: that it is both given and defined by God, and that it has real bearing on our service to God.

Femininity’s Foundation

Our culture likes to say that there is no such thing as gender, or that if there is such a thing, it does not affect what one can or cannot, should or shouldn’t do. But is that what God says about it?

I challenge you to read through your Bible, paying close attention to what it says about men and women. The first three chapters alone give a very clear concept of gender differences and roles, and God is consistent throughout both the Old and the New Testaments in the view of gender and gender roles presented.

Now, while it is true that there are certain aspects in which serving God boils down to the same thing regardless of one’s gender, age, season of life, and so on, the Bible is clear.

God created two genders on purpose, and that those two genders are specifically designed to be different one from the other and to fulfill different roles. These roles beautifully complement each other and make life, family, church, and society function smoothly and efficiently. When God’s design is followed, we are the most fulfilled and satisfied, because we are literally doing what we were made to do.

This post isn’t here to convince those who want to argue against what the Bible clearly states. Perhaps I will go into that issue further in another post, but today I simply want to cast a vision for those who accept what the Bible says about God’s purpose in giving the gift of gender and want to know what it means to serve God as a woman.

Mary of Bethany

I’m going to use an example from Scripture which might not seem like the most obvious example, but it is the example God has been laying on my heart this week.

Mark 14:3-9 gives us the story of Mary of Bethany and her remarkable anointing of Jesus.

Whether or not you are familiar with the story, I encourage you to go read it for yourself before reading the rest of this post. Even better, keep your Bible open to the passage as you read, so you can check my observations against the Bible for yourself!

Doing what you can…

As I read this passage earlier in the week, I was struck by Jesus’ words in verse 8:

“She hath done what she could”

We often get distracted from serving by thoughts of why we can’t serve in the ways we want to.  

For those of us single Christian ladies, the temptation is to feel like we can’t serve God until we are doing so as a wife or mother. Married women often struggle to feel they cannot serve God as much as they were able to before marriage.

Whatever our season or circumstances of life, we can always find some reason to complain about the ways in which we “cannot” serve God.

To be honest, such complaining is not only a waste of time, it is also an act of rebellion against the limitations God has allowed, and often just an excuse for why we are not doing the things God actually wants us to do.

I don’t know if Mary of Bethany ever struggled with that. I only know that these words of Jesus tell us that she did what she could.

The following are several principles about Mary’s service to the Lord which stand out to me from this passage.

She served with what God had given her.

The bottle of ointment Mary broke to pour out over Jesus’ feet was very costly. (Hence the disciples’ indignation.) It was possibly even her dowry, a way of saving towards a future marriage. Regardless, we know that it represented a large sum of money, and although it was a sacrifice, Mary gave it freely.

That brings me to my next observation:

She served from her heart

Our service to God is often less than glamorous.

In this present season of life, God has called me to be an elementary teacher, so for me, serving God often means tying shoes or cleaning up after a sick child or sorting out the pettiest of grievances among my students.

When those small tasks seem too ordinary, too insignificant, or too mundane to be of any value, I must remind myself that these small tasks are nevertheless an opportunity to sacrifice.

Every juice box I open, every stuck zipper I fix, every childish sorrow I soothe is an opportunity to exercise Christlikeness, giving up just a tiny bit of my time and effort to help another. These mundane acts of service to God are also opportunities to be the hands and feet of Christ to those whom we serve.

When we demonstrate the Christlike heart of putting others’ needs before our own, we are putting the love of God on display for all to see.

She served within her role as a woman.

This is, as I said, an unpopular truth of Scripture, but it is nevertheless a truth. We serve the God who spoke the universe into being, and yet put intricate detail into the minutest most basic parts of His creation.

If we believe that God gave each person a unique set of fingerprints and knows the number of hairs on the head of each one, is it a stretch to believe that He also purposefully assigns each person a specific gender? And if we believe that God made us to be a specific gender, does it not also follow that He did so in order that we might serve Him within the roles He has established for that gender?

Mary of Bethany was a woman, and she poured out her precious ointment from the overflow of her womanly heart. To anoint a body for burial was considered in that day to be “women’s work.” It was one way in which she could show the depth of her love and devotion to Christ, and I believe God prompted her to do it at that specific moment, because Christ’s resurrection would occur before the women could get to the tomb to anoint His body.

Mary’s act of anointing also displays how our natural design as women can play into our service for the Lord. God made women to be life-bearers and nurturers. By anointing Jesus for His burial, Mary was pouring out her future (if the ointment was indeed her dowry) in order to meet a physical need of the Savior she so loved.

You and I may not be able to meet a physical need of Christ Himself, but we can meet the needs of those He loves, and by doing so, serve the Lord Himself. In Matthew 25:40, Jesus says,

“Inasmuch as ye have done it unto one of the least of these my brethren, ye have done it unto Me.”

She served in humility

Mary’s act of anointing was not done to draw attention to herself. We don’t see her noisily defending herself against the criticism of those who objected to the “waste” of such a precious ointment.

Instead, it seems that she just quietly faded into the background, allowing Christ to be the one to defend her, voicing His approval of her selfless act of love.

What about us?

Do we serve God with the things He has given us?

Elisabeth Elliot was a missionary who lost her first husband to martyrdom. You probably heard about Jim Elliot, her first husband, but you might not know that God gave her a second husband, whom she lost to cancer, (as well as a third who outlived her.)

Speaking of her second husband and his battle with the illness which eventually claimed his life, she said something that struck a chord when I heard it. She said that if all you have to offer back to God is a broken heart, offer that.

We often feel we have nothing worthwhile to offer to the Lord, but in reality, everything He gives us is to be offered back to Him.

Has God given you money? Serve Him with it. Has He given you poverty? Serve Him with that by allowing Him to teach you to trust Him to provide for your needs.

Has God given you health and strength? Use it all for Him. Has He allowed you to suffer illness or injury that limits your physical ability to serve Him? Serve Him with your infirmity: pray, saturate yourself in Scripture, and learn the lessons of pain and sickness so that God can use you to bless others with the comfort He has given you. (2 Corinthians 1:4)

Do we serve God from the heart?

I so often slip into a routine and forget that I am serving God as much in the little things as in those that seem big or important. Even writing this post has made me realize a couple areas in which I have been just coasting along instead of purposefully serving from my heart.

Are we serving within the role God has designed us for?

Do we ladies cheerfully accept our femininity and the unique roles it entails, or do we try to compete with the men around us? Do we delight in our femininity, or are we more apt to grumble about the things we “have to” or “don’t get to” do because we are women?

The philosophy of feminism which has pervaded our culture and even our churches would have us believe that men have it easy, and that women are somehow missing out when we embrace femininity. That is simply not true.

Each gender is designed with its own strengths and weaknesses, and the roles God designed each to fill have their advantages as well as their difficulties.

To say that women are disadvantaged when they live like women is to imply that men are superior simply by nature of being men. (Which, I might add, is the very philosophy feminists claim to fight against!)

Don’t let the lie of feminism cheat you out of the beautiful gift of femininity. Instead, learn to delight in serving God as a woman, for that is what He made you for. We are different and distinct for a glorious purpose, and it should be an honor to serve God in the capacity for which He has designed us.

Are we serving God in humility?

1 Peter 3:3-4 gives us a picture of a woman’s godly character on display. Notice the last phrase:

“Whose adorning let it not be that outward adorning of plaiting the hair, and of wearing of gold, or of putting on of apparel; But let it be the hidden man of the heart, in that which is not corruptible, even the ornament of a meek and quiet spirit, which is in the sight of God of great price.”

God values humility. A woman with a meek and quiet spirit will have a quiet willingness to put others first, content just to serve her Savior, regardless of whether or not anyone notices or praises her for it.

To serve God as a woman means many things, but I hope these four are a blessing and encouragement to you as you ask the Holy Spirit to show you how you can serve Him better.